On the square III: Post Script

On the square III: Post Script

Theatre is female. Daphne opened the door, Regina called me in, Sharon took me with her and Sam showed me everything. These are all my girls, I love them with impunity, they loved me and I love them forever. After I took the "Dress Code" script, I experienced some turbulence. Me and Regina were at loggerheads and she didn't want me at the theatre anymore. I had defied, disrespected her and my time working as stage manager was done! I was tired of being bossed around, she was tyrannical and condescending. She never missed the opportunity to remind me that I owed her for the job. It was unfair and inaccurate, I landed the job myself. I talked to Daphne, I was at the theatre every week watching shows, the theatre needed help with operations and they approached me to help and I accepted. Regina switched everything around, it was I who needed the job, I was lucky to be there and she was the one who hired me not Daphne. I went with what she said because I needed to be there so I can understand the landscape and be apart of theatre. She started with that narrative very early on, one the first day and she was on top from the very first day. She dominated me, she was overbearing, she humiliated me, every time Daphne paid me, she made it a point to ask me how much she had paid me. After my response she would proceed on reminding me how lucky I was I had that job. I was doing the job, I was perfect at it, I was an asset to theatre and yet I was in bondage to her! She used to tell me every day that this was her theatre. Her demeanor was narcissistic. I hated that. I knew I wasn't going to last from the first day she took that R100 from me, I knew I would turn on her sooner rather than later. What she didn't understand is that I wasn't motivated by money or fear, I was doing this for the love. That gave me the edge to be strategic because I wasn't afraid of losing the job, I welcomed it if it meant I couldn't work with dignity. She wanted your balls for that paycheck and my balls were mine. I dislike being micromanaged, I prefer to work with autonomy and space, I will do the job perfect if not I will take responsibility for the down fall. I don't need to be put down and reprimanded in front of an audience, that won't give you the best results. The truth is that me taking that script was premeditated, I was being spiteful, I wanted her to see and acknowledge me, it was my receipt for everything and my way of showing her that I was pretty narcissistic too. The script had other uses too, I took it to get close to the cast, I knew I wasn't going to last at the theatre. I anticipated her response, she was outraged and played the victim when I was only reflecting her, I knew my position at the theatre was secured. I stayed away for a while but I'll be back.

Now that I wasn't working at the theatre anymore, I connected with Sharon. When we were together working on the "Dress Code", she said she wanted to take me with her after "Dress Code". I never forgot that. I told her the theatre didn't have space for me anymore and reminded her of what she said. She acquiesced and stuck to her word giving me tickets to her shows. When I talked to her, she was there, responding with speed, attention and care. It would have been easy to dismiss me but she didn't. When theatre had turned it's back on me and I had nothing, she was there, she was theatre and she was the best. Her show with Allen Committee "Same Time, Next Year" at Montecasino was awesome, she mesmerized me, such talent, I was in awe and she took me to Montecasino, something that raised my spirits because I was not on the square anymore. I will never forget Sharon Spiegel-Wagner, she was there for me, she's the reason I stayed with theatre and she did it alone. She did take me with her, after the square, I was at two of her shows. I got VIP treatment, I had the best seats and got to see her and hug her after the show. Only good feelings about Sharon. 

I came back on the square to watch some shows and was a regular again. They had some kid who replaced me. Good kid, good energy and we connected quite well but to be honest he wasn't better than me. I was not intimidated at all, in fact I was relieved. True, I do have a bias that makes me think I am the best but I also give credit where it's due. I didn't think this new kid was going to last. I thought Regina was going to eat him up! I was happy he was there because he gave me space to maneuver around. With him around I'd be at the theatre more often and have zero responsibilities whilst engaging and living with the people in the theatre. The last time I was there, I didn't control the narrative, I worked there for a month and towards the end I was painted as an asshole. A label I welcome because I had to be one. With the new kid there, I'd paint my picture, they would see me for who I was and not through unfair projections that weighed me down. I would interact with the staff and help out where necessary whilst avoiding being micromanaged and taking orders from the boss. It was perfect, let him do the job, I'll take the credit, my plan was long-term. It worked out pretty well, the theatre was home again, every time I showed up I was greeted with a cold beverage and the staff absolutely loved me. When the theatre was packed I assisted the staff and Daphne would give me something in terms of monetary compensation. It was part-time work but I got what I wanted, I was working with autonomy. The new kid didn't last, he was my replacement but I was working alongside him. I was doing his job better than him. He was the second replacement who couldn't replace me, oh well at least he worked for a couple of months. After months of labor, Regina finally let down her guard and welcomed me back to the theatre. She gave me back my R100 and I apologized for taking the script, I acknowledged it was a jerk move and we have a new relationship. The truth is that I've been an asshole at times, I did her and the theatre wrong, I am not perfect. Still, she forgave me multiple times and tried to show me what was right. I realize that she fought with me so much because she cared. She was the only person who cared. She wanted me to do the right thing. I love her for that even though at times I couldn't communicate that. Yes, I was selfish and egotistical but it was a defense mechanism. The world had not been kind to me. She gave me everything, she gave me a chance, she took me me in and I will always be grateful for that. I love her the best. Love flows, we are cool. 

One day I came in to watch "Vincent", a show I knew pretty well. It was their second run, their first run was successful. The show is highly acclaimed and was always sold out. I served as a member of the production team on the first run and I was happy to be a part of the crowd for the second. That's when I met Sam of SamSays and we connected right away, with the greatest of ease. It was so easy talking to Sam, everything flowed. She was a theatre enthusiast and knew everything and everyone. She reviewed shows and went all around the country. We talked about theatre and the Springboks, the World Cup final was playing that day All Blacks vs. Springboks, a game we won! It was a perfect day, "Vincent" was a masterpiece and we won the World Cup. I followed her on her socials and we have been close ever since. She has taken me everywhere! She recommends the best shows and she helps out in every way possible. No hyperbole, Sam is the best thing that has happened to me in the world of theatre. She expanded my horizon and I met new and awesome people because of her. Her reviews are great and I rate her very highly. I never would have met Sam if I didn't take that "Dress Code" script, I never would have connected with Sharon Spiegel-Wagner if it weren't for that script. Taking that script is the best thing I've ever done. Theatre loves me post that script.